It happened again. I was laying down on my side and I couldn’t breath. it’s not even that I was completely thinking about it, but I just was thinking about Kurt and was thinking about how much had changed and watching this movie about this girl who had sex for fun and I just couldn’t breath. It was the most overwhelming event that I’ve had in weeks and I just couldn’t. I froze. It felt like I raced back in time and I couldn’t handle being where I am at now. And I couldn’t change anything because I just froze. Distant. Incoherent. Blank.